“The way we talk to our children becomes their inner voice.” – Peggy O’Mara
That’s a lot of power and responsibility to bear as parents, but of course, it’s true.
We give them our language, our culture, our food, our beliefs, our insecurities, and our trauma. Those stories are embedded in our conversations with our children.
So is our voice empowering them or haunting them?
At a very early age, I chose to give my daughters three empowering words that I wanted to echo in their minds through all the good and bad times to come.
You are brilliant, beautiful leaders.
I wanted them to make these attributes part of their identity, part of their source code. Those three little words hold so much meaning and power that can be applied in all contexts of life.
BRILLIANT: You are smart and can learn anything if you put your mind to it. With the access of information freely available, ignorance is a choice; choose knowledge and wisdom.
BEAUTIFUL: You are an attractive human being with physical attributes that the world appreciates. Yet you’re even more beautiful inside. Outer beauty fades; internal beauty lasts a lifetime. Never forget that.
LEADERS: You are vulnerable and lead by example. You know you are not perfect and prone to human error. Yet you show, stand up, and continue to share your voice which empowers those around you to do the same.
I would whisper these words in their ears early and often. Any time they were having a hard time at school, they would hear it. At bedtime, as I was kissing them good night, they would hear it. When they were struggling with a decision, you guessed it:
You are brilliant, beautiful leaders.
You are brilliant, beautiful leaders.
You are brilliant, beautiful leaders.