In the past 330 days or so I have let go of (unrealistic) expectations.
Especially as it relates to women and love interests. What do I mean by this you wonder…
Well, let’s just say that if I meet a woman I’m attracted to, I don’t begin to run her through an mental inspection to evaluate if she is Girlfriend material.
I prefer to let grow organically. This has obviously got me in trouble with some people because it is not the norm.
My “justification” for this is to let just things “Be” and let them develop. As a Girlfriend she would have to be a great friend. And how does this happen if not through time. If we get there together does this not make more a more fulfilling relationship? I’m just saying.
I find it unfair to immediately place the expectation of Girlfriend (or wifey) on every woman to whom I am attracted. I am good alone… but eventually will be better with my partner. My friend. My lover.
But Teevee don’t you believe in Love at first sight?
Not really. I believe in most cases it’s more like Lust at First Sight. You can call that chemistry- which is critical to any healthy relationship, but even after the chemistry experiment has been conducted, you still have to see if you are compatible and if you can put up with each others’ crap. (Yea, I said it!)
Compatible for me is summed up with these questions: Can I accept this person for their good AND not so good qualities? Do their redeeming qualities far exceed their not so redeeming qualities?
I can imagine a lot of people just shaking their heads in disgust right now. 🙂 And that’s ok.
I have made many mistakes in my life in which I did this very thing and was in a hurry to get into relationships based on my desperate insecurity and needing to have a woman by my side.
Something had to change. Because you know the definition of insanity. 😉
So, for me… I have let go of expectations (except for that one woman…)