A Facebook friend messaged me and said, “I have never heard you speak poorly of their mother.”
“You’re quite astute,” I replied. As a rule, I never speak badly about my ex-wife (or any ex).
I chose her.
If I talk badly about her, it speaks more to my own poor decision-making than it does her character. Plus, I think of myself as a classy man.
Although my ex-wife and I have had our issues over the years, I made it a point to swallow my ego and let it go.
My daughters are worth that effort.
The Ego is The Enemy, as the author, Ryan Holiday, likes to say. I’ve observed that one of the first significant obstacles after divorce is recognizing when the ego is trying to run the show.
“I’m right! You’re wrong!”
It would have set a nasty tone for the relationship and take focus away from raising my daughters. If I attack my ex-wife, I make it about me, not our girls.
I don’t give a shit about winning any arguments nor gaining sympathy about my situation.
As a result, I’ve raised my daughters without clashing with their mom—no baby-mama drama. She allowed me to parent them in my own unique way and look at my girls now- shining.
This wouldn’t be possible if I allowed my ego to speak badly about their mother. Not a chance.
She will always have my respect for giving birth to my little suns.