I told this to my daughter as we were discussing lessons from the chapter she was reading in “The Obstacle is the Way” by Ryan Holiday.
In this chapter the author hammers the point of always maintaining power while living life and running across obstacles. Shit happens. Good and bad. Some even tragic. Yet, we always have a choice in those instances.
Some of our greatest challenges and failures can actually lead to our even greater accomplishments in life. This is why I told her that my divorce was my greatest failure.
I felt miserable. I failed them. My life literally felt like it was in pieces, but once I was done moping and feeling sorry for myself… I had to take action. Make bold decisions. FAST.
“Like chess!” I told her. In chess, you may lose your favorite piece (the queen) or your strategy may blow up in your face, yet you still have to continue playing. Your opponent does not stop his attack. Life does not stop. The game continues and yet you can still win.
What I loved even more about our conversation was that when I used my divorce from their mother a real world example, she said she was thinking the same thing about the divorce. She got there first!
My divorce, my perceived failure, has been one of the absolute best things that has ever happened to me. Here I am now.
It was a good conversation.
I bought 2 extra copies of the book for each of them. We will be having these conversations for a long time.