I’m sitting here listening to them breathe.
I pause to focus and get emotional every time I allow myself to experience a burst of memories that take me through the last few years of life.
When they were younger, that I could carry them in my forearms facing down. I imagine this is a bit tough to imagine, but trust me, it’s a precious image.
They have always been small for their ages in stature. But their spirits and energy have been able to fill the room.
I picked up Fe last night to put her to bed and realized that within the next couple of months I will not be able to carry her around anymore. She’s getting very tall and heavy. And this saddens me.
My younger princess is growing quickly as well, but she runs a bit on the short side so I have a few more years to carry her.
Despite their quick maturity and growth, they remember.
They remember where they belong.
From the time they were newborns I would put them to sleep by laying them on my chest in a very specific manner.
From time to time they still climb on daddy and make sure to place their little heads in just the right position to relax and let go of their little childhood stresses.
And I, of course, go back to them being littler versions of themselves. And I just feel pure happiness. Nothing else matters in those moments.
Nothing.
This is where they belong. This is home.