I Hated my Smile

I hated smiling in photos. I didn’t like my smile and made sure never to do it. I felt like I looked like an idiot.

It’s not hard to avoid smiling if you’re unhappy with your life. It was the last year of my marriage, and I was going through old photos of myself with my daughters.

Of course, they’re smiling from ear to ear. They’ve always been happy little girls. There I was, looking like a sad little man, refusing to smile if the camera was pointing in my direction.

Then I had a thought that woke me up.

What if my daughters see these photos when they’re older and wonder why I was always sad or even mad? I loved our memories together, but you would never know that from looking at the photos.

I had to change my attitude. For them. For me. I decided to smile more and get over my insecurity.

But how? How can I smile and make sure it’s genuine? I didn’t want to have one of those forced smiles. Being the problem-solver I am, I created this little trick to generate a genuine smile.

I’d whisper to myself: “I’m a SEXY MOTHAFU#%@.”

It worked immediately! I imagine it’s because it’s an outlandish thing to think. But I had to say it with conviction—no half-ass sexiness.

I’m proud to say there are now plenty of photos of my little family where we’re all smiling. These days it’s much easier because I am more comfortable in my skin.

Go ahead and try it. If you’re ever in a pinch and need to smile in your photos, just say this: “I’M A SEXY MOTHAFU#%@.”

The crazy thing is that now I believe it. It’s funny how that works.

By Teevee Aguirre